News from the Red Planet

This week up and flew by. The weather has slumped into the promised forecast of cold and drizzly, but I don't mind.

Last night, we went to a honey festival. I was picturing a scene out of "Pushing Daisies," with cute little cottages, honey flavored food and bee-themed souvenirs, but instead, the metro deposited us in industrial West Moscow. The festival delivered what it promised; there were about three hundred honey kiosks, but in typical Russian style, things were down to business. The honey ice cream and honey-glazed peanuts were sadly absent. Every booth had a few jars of their best honey available for testing, and you could try as much as you wanted, but you had to try it plain. As appealing as unlimited honey sounds initially, I can assure you that after booth four, it was losing it's charm. There were also honey beverages, ranging from honey vodka to honey beer to something that might have been honey water. I planned on buying a jar of actual honey, but I spent my last eighty rubles on a bottle of mead (which, by the way, will be the name of my first country/russian-folk fusion album). The mead was hands-down the best drink there. If it lasts more than a week, I'll bring some home. It tastes like liquid flowers. The beer tasted like liquid tree bark.

We performed our first scenes in acting class yesterday. 

We have two acting professors, Big Misha and Little Misha. Little Misha is twenty-five and about 6'4". Big Misha is ten inches shorter and forty years older.

Little Misha has done an impressive thing. Within one day of meeting him, five of us fell madly in love and swore that he felt the same. We were picturing our futures with him in Russia: cute little Russian flats and going to the Russian theater in our fuzzy Russian coats, holding mittened hands... and then we found out that four more people felt this way. Our hearts were broken. THEN we found out that our Russian love was already married. For the second time. The following class was icy, to say the least. 

Little Misha is the next big thing in the acting world (he and Patricia Skarbinski). He graduated from MXT at twenty-one (this isn't abnormal, since most incoming first-years are between sixteen and eighteen), but stayed on to get his masters. After THAT graduation, the MXT staff decided to keep him. He has two productions running in Moscow right now, which is truly a feat for someone so young, especially since they've been running for several years. To launch a show as a student director and have it stay afloat is hugely impressive. We may get to see one of them.

Sometimes, when he's giving us examples in class, he acts them out. It's brilliant. 

Big Misha is Russian Dumbledore. He gives me lemon candy and tells us that beauty is all he has left. When he sees me, he sometimes says, "Amaaaalia. My beautiful, my daaaarlink Amaaaalia," so... big points for Big Misha. He is a lovely, sweet child at heart. He's also a sharp acting professor. Big Misha is, of course, a legend, and has changed many acting lives for the better. He loves his students, but isn't afraid to be blunt. I truly respect both of our professors.

We just got back from a four hour bus tour of Moscow. It was supposed to be two hours. The tour guide was a future Rachel Dratch SNL skit. She spoke really slowly and seductively and kept repeating certain Russian buzzwords: "THEES? Is Lyeneens tomb. Eet is NAME? for Lyeneen. ALSO? Lyeneen square. It is NAME? for Lyeneen also." My friend Zack is preparing a skit for when we get home. As soon as we reached the dorms, he grabbed a frying pan (we all swarmed the kitchen because we hadn't expected to be gone very long and were SO HUNGRY when we got back) and goes, "THEES? Ees frying pan. It was MADE? In time of Lyeneen. It is LYENEEN? Frying pan." Other favorite quotes from the tour: "To your left, University of Moscow State. To your right, green plastic toilets. You have five minutes," and, "We come to this memorial to celebrate Day of Victory, Day of Moscow, and Day of Pancakes." Apparently, Day of Pancakes is a big holiday here. How it hasn't caught on in the states, I'll never know.

Favorite Russian wives' tales: 

If someone sneezes after your statement, это правда! It's true!

If you stumble, someone is thinking about you.

Women who sit on cold floors will become barren.

Butter is good for you.

Happy 21st to Brittney Frohn on October 5th! 

I have taken pictures. Hopefully, the next entry will be a visual one. 

Also. Little Misha has a fledgling mullet. My only love sprung from my only hate! 

Love you.